8 Things She Secretly Loves

alexaming:

8 little things that makes a difference.

Originally posted on James Michael Sama:

Now that we’ve discussed 8 Things Guys Secretly Love, we can’t forget the general theme of this blog – being chivalrous and romantic towards women. Striving to be better. Building healthier relationships.

That being said, what are some things that you may not realize make as big of an impact as they do?

Here are eight things that she secretly loves.

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Good morning texts.

A good morning text first thing doesn’t just say “good morning” – it says “you’re the first person I thought of when I woke up today.”

For over a year I have sent one of these to my girlfriend literally every single day without missing one. Small romantic acts aren’t just for the “honeymoon phase” of your relationship. Consistency is key.

Hint: This includes goodnight texts, too.

Play with her hair if you’re laying together on the couch or in bed.

Just do it. Trust…

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Superheroes

Who's your daddy?

Who’s your daddy?

When we are in a relationship, we would think the world of our partner, put he/she on a pedestal, make ourselves believe that he or she is a superhero that has come into our lives to save the day. They really are superheroes for the way they make us feel alive, loved and cared for day in and day out. The problem is when you start living with your superhero, you would realize that they are human after all with the farting, the burping, the snoring, the morning breath and the habits that may just vex you.

Over time, we would stop seeing them as the superheroes that they are and we would demote them to humans, with flaws and all; take them off the pedestal that we have put them on without realizing that when they get off the pedestal, they would take our desire for them, with them. Sex would no longer be something to look forward to or plan for and it would start feeling like an obligation or a chore.

How do we turn it back to the way it was when the sex was good and left us glowing for days basking in that euphoric bliss that only love and intimacy could bring?

I have lived with a man for 10 years and have been on my own again for 5 years. Based on my own experience, this much I know is true.

Create space

A space between you and your significant other would allow you to miss each other’s presence, to down play and trivialise human flaws and to remember his godliness or her inner goddess. Space helps us to remember why we fall in love and of all the superhero qualities that attracted us to our partners.

Be an individual

Along with that, is the quest for fun and adventure that makes the journey all the more meaningful and memorable. We should never stop wanting to discover what the world has to offer on our own as individuals and together as a couple. Being part of an entity should strengthen who you are as a person and not diminish your individuality.

Make continuous effort

It is human nature that we make effort to win the heart of another but when we do, we fall into a comfort zone and the effort stops. The thrill is in keeping what we have fresh rather than in the chase. It is important to continue looking good and dressing up even though we have seen each other naked a million times. It makes a difference when we smell nice from top to bottom making the journey south a delight rather than a drag. It feels good to keep hearing those compliments reminding us how our partner sees us even though we know how special we are. We are all superheroes but sometimes we are also sidekicks to each other, feeding each other’s ego and providing support in ways that we can; physically and emotionally.

Here’s to never forgetting that we are in relationships with our very own superheroes with human qualities and to never losing the desire for them despite their human ways.

 

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Window

Your body is away from me
But there is a window open
from my heart to yours.
From this window, like the moon
I keep sending news secretly.

~Rumi

 

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I loved what Lauren Martin said in her recent contribution on EliteDaily, on the 7 Mistakes You Might Want to Avoid Now So They Don’t Become Lifelong Regrets.

“Love is the only real and honest thing in this world and refusing to accept it is denying yourself maybe the only real thing worth living for. Too many times people find a way to reject love, either because they are scared or don’t recognize it when it wraps its comfortable arms around them. Take love from everyone, don’t be afraid to fall head first into it and protect it as the most sacred thing in your life when you’ve found it.”

I have found love on several occasions in the years that I have been single again. Let’s just say that I totally agree with F. Scott Fitzgerald’s view points on love and how we should approach it.  It did not mean he loved Zelda less. Sometimes we forget that we are capable of so much more and that includes our hearts and our capacity to love.

I am never afraid of being lonely. Maybe because I am an only child who have came to love the solitude. The solitude that is now a part of my process to do what I need to do or spend time on what I am most passionate about.  In reality, I love the presence of someone in the background to balance the solitude.  True, I am never bored because I can always find something that I can do or fill my time with like reading, enjoying my music and allocating time for random pinnings of whatever interests me.

But at the end of the day, it is about having someone to share your daily sexy selfies and silly thoughts with and all the important ones like what to have for dinner. It is about having someone to impress just by being myself and not even having to try at all. Someone to indulge in the bedroom and someone to feed. Someone to have adventures with; even if it is as trivial as trying the new Chennai restaurant in the neighbourhood. Someone to laugh with. Someone who cares.

We keep windows open for love to embrace us in the most beautiful ways. We let ourselves be consumed with words, the veiled kisses, the real wet ones, the euphoria of orgasmic waves and of visions of what’s in store for lovebirds who endure. The future is now. Recognize it, seize it, enjoy it, be grateful for it and tell me I’m the one rocking your future. And you know that won’t be a lie.

 

 

 

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Trick or treat?

Tricks

So much to do, but I can’t help but rewind,
One thing stays constant on my mind.
Could it be the company or the wine?
Playing tricks on this heart of mine.

His presence is quiet intoxication, spell-binding,
His appeal is invisibly magnetic, mesmerizing;
Like patchouli on a hot summer day,
Clings and lingers, in a sexy, beguiling way.

The smell of him on my skin,
I’d wear him between my breasts,
And when the holy water part me from within;
I’d still taste him on my breaths.

Sweet and addictive
Makes me submissive
It’s almost destructive
Do I need a motive?

I don’t think so…

I can’t let this one go, no?
So sit back and enjoy the show.
Watch us go,
Looking for a bird called swallow.

They say it is true love, lucky fellow.

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May 12, 2014 · 6:03 AM

He’s the man.

He's the man.

I believe every lie that I ever told,
Paid by the hearts that I ever stole,
I played my cards and I didn’t fold;
Well it ain’t that hard when you got soul.

Somewhere I heard that life is a test,
I been through the worse but I still give my best.

I got all the answers to all your questions,
I’d be the teacher you could be the lesson;
I’d be the preacher you’d be the confession,
I’d be the quick relief to what you’re stressing.

It’s a thin line between love and hate,
Is it really real or is it really fate?

Got my soldiers, standing on my feet,
No surrender and I won’t retreat.

Stand up now and face the sun,
Hard not to tell then turn and run,
It’s time to do what must be done;
Be a king when kingdom comes.

So you can tell everybody,

I’m the man, I’m the man, I’m the man.

Yes I am, yes I am, yes I am.

~Aloe Blacc

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May 9, 2014 · 3:54 AM

Dejavu

Dejavu

I had a dejavu,

Thought I saw you,

Out of the blue,

I had no clue.

My fragmented and patched heart skipped a beat

My legs glued to the floor.

I felt the heat,

Piercing through the closed glass door.

Suddenly I realized I no longer have tears

Misty-eyed by the visions of you

For I have moved on, without fear

Mended pieces of my heart no longer bled for you.

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May 6, 2014 · 11:14 AM

The shadow

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In all the world, there is no heart for me like yours,

In all the world, there is no love for you like mine.

I do not love you as if you were salt rose,

Or topaz, or the arrow of carnations the fire shoots off.

I love you as certain dark things are to be loved,

In secret between the shadow and the soul.

That’s where we exist,

That is where you want to be and where you belong;

Although it is not where I want you to be, where we should be.

As certain as your past held you back from declaring your love,

Just as much certainty in the effect,

As certain as the cause that leads;

To the inability to shape our path, to seeing how much stronger we can be

Or the difference we can make to shape mankind;

For no difference can be made lurking in the shadows,

Turning the most magical insignificant.

Your lack of faith in me, in seeing me as the masses when you know I am the only one.

Oh how little you know me when you have seen so much.

I have died and you brought me back to life,

Only to kill me again.

 

 

 

 

 

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